Don't worry Sully, you are still my first son and baby!
We are going to have a baby. A baby girl. My mom would have been so happy to be physically here on earth during this time. She loved kids. She never knew I grew up, but she loved kids. I can only imagine her reaction when we first got pregnant and her reaction for the first time seeing our baby.
I guarantee she would call me everyday and make sure that Lindsay was ok and that the baby was ok. I can only see it now. She would call everyday just to see how our baby and Lindsay were doing. I miss that. I miss that feeling of what could have been. I miss my mom and a lot more knowing I'm starting my own family. I am blessed to be in control of the situation and be the dad I want to be to my baby and Lindsay can do the same as well. We are creating our own family now and we'll always be an extension of our parents.
Here's the weird part: To our baby, some of our grandparents and my mom are just stories told through pictures and some video. That's sad to me, but I also know that's reality. Death is inevitable and knowing that and embracing that knowledge allows me to put my time and energy in to things I want to spend my life doing. This also means I want to lead by example for my daughter and show her that daddy made something special out himself while still being a great dad.
I couldn't be more excited to be a dad, especially to a little girl. I can't wait to experience that relationship and love this little thing....forever. Souls are real, energy is real. I feel it and I will definitely feel my mom through our new baby girl.
To life, everyone!